The following is the transcript of an actual call made to 999 the emergency services:
Police: "Police emergency"
Caller: "Hello, I'm next to the M32, city centre..., there's M32 city centre sign. Can you inform the RSPCA there's a grey squirrel here but no hazelnut trees, please?"
Police: "Madam, you have phoned emergency services"
Caller: "Yes"
Police: "And you're telling us there's a squirrel with no hazelnut trees"
Caller: "Yes. So you can inform the RSPCA"
Police: "And you're phoning on 999 for that."
Caller: "Yes. His life in danger. It's rare. He's a grey squirrel. It's a rare species."
Police: "Grey Squirrels aren't rare madam, it's the red ones that are rare".
Caller: "Well actually this one's half and half, and grey squirrels are the rare ones. It might be a cross breed, oh my god it's even rarer!"
And these people are allowed to vote and have children.
Bravo
How it should have gone...
Police: Please wait there, we'll be straight round.
Woman: ok
5 minutes later
Police: Are you the woman that phoned about the squirrel?
Woman: Yes
Bang
Police to radio: Coroner required, I got her.
Radio: Good shot!
david hobbs
Or perhaps she should be in the early episodes of the X factor.
